Five Ways of Letting Toxic People out of Your Life

Do you have someone in your life who tries to control or manipulate you, sabotage your self-improvement or bring you down? It could be that the person you have in mind is toxic.

Toxic influences in our lives can be draining. Trying to maintain a relationship or friendship with someone who is toxic is simply exhausting. I’m speaking from experience here, and one of the best things I have done in my life is remove toxic people from it.

That might sound harsh, cut throat or like betrayal. However, sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind. Your life will be happier, healthier and more fulfilling without toxic people clogging it up.

To let go of toxic people, it’s first important to consider what constitutes a toxic person. Toxic people:

  • Will try to control you. This could be blatant attempts to control you, or something more covert and sinister.

  • Will play the victim. Whenever something goes wrong, they will never actually be in the wrong. They won’t take any responsibility for their part in whatever has gone wrong and will blame everyone else before looking at themselves. Toxic people may even create situations so they’re able to be a victim.

  • Take without giving. All types of relationships should be pretty equal and a bit of give and take is a normal part of it. However, toxic people will do lots of taking and not much giving. If your relationship or friendship is one sided, chances are they’re a toxic person.

  • Try to drag you into their dramas. Toxic people will often have some kind of drama happening in their lives and attempt to draw you into it. If you refuse to be part of the drama, that person may then turn on you. It’s another sign that they are toxic.

If you have any toxic people in your life, here’s how you can let them go: 

  • Take your time. You don’t need to cut them out of your life immediately. It may be a process that you go through. To begin with you could distance yourself by seeing other friends more or doing other things with your time.

  • Don’t be drawn into an argument if they demand to know why you don’t want to be associated with them any more. By being drawn into an argument, you’re giving them power. It’s ok to walk away and not provide a big explanation about why you’re letting them go.

  • Block them on social media. Sites such as Facebook can be battle grounds and are often littered with people’s dramas. Be the bigger person and simply block the person you’re letting go from your life. The person you block can say whatever they want but you don’t have the hassle of having to see it. Other people will come to their own conclusions.

  • Surround yourself with radiators rather than drains. Positivity is infectious, so focus on your relationships with people who lift you and make you feel good inside.

  • Tell yourself that you’re doing the right thing. It’s common to have feelings of regret or sadness that you’re no longer friends with someone, especially if they were once a close friend. However, just because someone has been your friend in the past it doesn’t mean they have to continue being your friend. The fact that they’re toxic may suggest they weren’t much of a friend in the first place. Feel confident in the decision you make when choosing to let someone go from your life, it’s for the best.

Life is all about being the best version of yourself, self-improvement and living in a way that fulfils you. By letting go of toxic people, you’ll be doing all those things and as a result will feel much freer.

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